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Let's Start at the Very Beginning, a Very Good Place to Start...
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OK, first off, I'm going to insult your intelligence by telling you that to start a new game, select "New Game" on the file selection screen. Now I'm going to insult your intelligence again by telling you to select "Wait" when you reach this screen, meaning that enemies won't attack you while you trudge through menus in battle... After all, you'll need all the help you can get if you're already accessing a walkthrough and you're only this far into the game! |
| All you kiddies who like to give cah-RAZY names to your RPG characters, rejoice! For the sake of simplicity, I'm going to keep all the characters' names as the default. But feel free to name Crono "Ass", or "Poopy", or whatever you like to name your characters. |  |
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After Crono's mom rudely wakes him up, Crono will hop out of his bed, fully clothed, sword sheathed and all. Apparently, he's already ready in case the commies bust through his window and try to kill him in the middle of the night. Anyway, talk to your mom downstairs, and she'll reveal that she's either a drunken alcoholic or a sufferer of premature alzheimer's disease, as she cannot seem to remember the name of the only friend Crono has had his entire life. |
| Badger your mom again, and she'll pay you money to leave her alone. Wheee! |  |
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Before you enter the fair, now would be a good time to rummage around the town for free stuff. Head to the elder of Truce's house first. This place is nice for "new00bz0rz" (or whatever you kids call each other) like you, since it basically tells you how to do EVERYTHING. Anyway, steal the Elder's treasures, both upstairs and downstairs (you'll get a Tonic and 100G), then keep talking to this guy upstairs. He'll be so impressed that a kid isn't repulsed by his mere presence that he'll fork over 300G. |
| Now head south, to the town of Porre. Go to the elder's house, and head upstairs and take the elder's precious shelter from his chest. Then go downstairs and talk to him. He'll give you 10G if you act like a chicken. No use in being prideful, so just do it. You can keep leaving and coming back, and since the Elder has the memory of a goldfish, he'll keep giving you 10G over and over and over... |  |
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If you want, you can explore Guardia forest, just west of Truce. The enemies are pretty easy, and by killing the local flora and fauna here, you'll get some experience points. How sweet is that?! |
| If you notice a sparkly in the lower-right corner of the forest, you're not hallucinating. This is a tab, which permanently raises a certain stat by a point. This particular tab is a Power Tab (think of it as a steroid pill). Get it, give it to Crono, and watch his muscles bulge! |  |
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OK, fair time. There are a bunch of games set up here, and winning them will net you silver points, which is currency that only the fair accepts. The first game can be found in the southwest portion of the fair. Just like real hammer-swinging contests, you win this one by pressing A when you're as far away from the target as possible. If you can ring the bell you'll win 1 lousy silver point. Yay?! |
| You'll also probably notice some freaks running circles around the southern part of the fairgrounds. They're not crazy, they're just in a race. Talk to this guy when all four are at the starting line, and you can bet on the race. The old man just to the right gives his predictions, but he's an idiot, so don't listen to him. Anyway, you can sometimes slow down/speed up the runners if you run next to them, so do this to help your chosen runner win. Get it right and you'll net 20 silver points. Not bad... |  |
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In the far northwest corner of the fair is this metal monstrosity, Gato. He'll challenge you to a fight, and if you win, you get 15 silver points. Not too shabby... |
| In the northeast portion of the fair is this guy running a drinking contest. And that's drinking SODA, so don't get any ideas! Anyway, this contest consists of blistering up whichever digit you like to press buttons with by repeatedly pounding on "A", in hopes of drinking 8 cans. If you can drink all 8, you win 5 silver points. If you don't drink all 8, you win nothing. This contest is a waste of time, since it's almost impossible, and the prize sucks. If you're using a controller with a turbo function (or using an emulator...*cough*), you can rake in the silver points here with little trouble, though. And if you ARE using an emulator, combine your turbo button with the fast forward button and you'll max out your silver points in no time. |  |
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Now that you've won all these silver points, you probably want to spend them, am I right? Well, in the northern section of the fair, this guy offers you some money, but this is a rip off, so tell him to piss up a rope. |
| What you really want to do with your silver points is take them to the Tent of Horrors in the southeast portion of the fair. Here you can play games that cost 10, 40 or 80 silver points, and each nets you a different prize. Let's play, shall we? |  |
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The 10 silver point game has three identical soldiers with names stolen directly from Star Wars, Vicks (Biggs), Wedge and Piette. They'll run around in circles like idiots, and then ask you to identify one of them. You won't know who they'll ask about, so try to keep an eye on all three of them. If you win this, your lead character will get a Poyozo Doll for their room that plays music when you examine it. |
| The 40 silver point game has a clone of Crono come out and make gestures, which Crono must mirror. Press A to surprise Crono, Y to make him laugh, L to raise his left arm, and R to raise his right arm. Laugh when the clone laughs, be surprised when it's surprised, and so on. However, mirror his arm movements (when the Clone raises its left arm, Crono should raise his right). Win this, and the clone will be sent to Crono's house. |  |
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You can't play the 80 silver point game since Crono, like you, has no friends. |
| But let's pretend Crono DOES have somebody with him, so I can describe this game. The companion will be slowly lowered into flames while three monsters will charge Crono. The object is to throw the little medals at the monsters and knock them back into the cage, all before they reach Crono or the friend is burnt to death. Be sure to raise the rope by examining the sparkle that appears. Anyway, win this one and you'll win a stray cat that was caught in the alley. |  |
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Let's advance the plot, shall we? In the northern part of the town, you'll see this blonde bimbo running around. So, do what you do in real life and ram into her. She'll fall to the ground, grab her crotch and complain about the pain... Where did you ram her anyway? |
| Now Crono should be on his best behavior if he wants a chance with this girl. So, fight your urge to grab her pendant that flew off and run away, and instead ask her if she's OK first. |  |
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Grab the pendant and talk to her again. Apparently she wants it back. Give it to her. |
| Excellent! Crono, you're doing great! I shouldn't have to tell you to accept her offer here. |  |
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Now she'll either expose her extreme ditzyness by forgetting her name, or try to think of an alias in case you try to stalk her in the future. Anyway, the default name the game gives is "Marle". |
| Crono's date has now officially began! Even though she likes Crono, you still have to be on your best behavior. I know it's a drag, but it's just something ya gotta do. See this guy just to the left of where you met Marle? That pink sack is his lunch. You can try to impress Marle by stealing and eating his lunch, sack and all, but I don't think she'll be impressed. Just leave him alone. Really, don't eat his lunch. |  |
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There's nothing girls like more than cute, cuddly animals, so you can really impress Marle by finding this girl's cat. It's right by the guy with the lunch. Talk to the cat and have it follow you back to the little girl. Marle's practically eating out of the palm of your hand now! |
| Oh, and don't try to sell Melchoir, the swordsmith, Marle's pendant. I doubt she'd like that much. |  |
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Marle was apparently packing heat, in the form of a crossbow, so you can take her to Guardia forest to kill some more helpless animals if you want, and when you get tired of that, you can talk to the little girl by the fountain, and she'll magically cause Lucca's invention to be ready to exhibit. |
| Before you get there, though, Marle's "candy" addiction will kick in. |  |
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Marle will take her sweet-ass time ordering, but resist the temptation to drag her away. Just put the controller down and wait. If Marle starts screaming that you're a kidnapper like the picture demonstrates, then that's bad. |
| Go to Lucca's invention and some story-type stuff will happen, and I'm a nice guy, so I won't spoil it. Here's a garbled picture that shows Crono being sucked into some sort of rip in the space time-continuum. Scary!!! |  |
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Where will Crono end up? Where did Marle go? Can Lucca really see the back of the moon with those glasses? Tune in next time to find out! Same Chrono time, same Chrono place! |