Akiko

Ok everybody, Akiko's not here, so let's talk about her! What's her purpose in this expedition?

Well, being a fellow woman...and by fellow woman, I don't mean I'm a fellow and a woman, I'm not a fellow at all, but I'm a woman, and since I'm a woman, I should know a thing or two about the other woman, Akiko, because I'm also a woman, and Emi's a woman too, but you never asked about her, but both me and her being women, I could tell you a thing or two about her as well...and on a further note, Mamiya is a woman, but she's a dead woman, so I could tell you a thing about her, but probably not two things about her...anyway...where was I?

Kazuo, do you want to tell us about Akiko?

Yes! I tell you about Akiko! She a nurse, and very good nurse at that! She heal wound very quickly! If I have wound, she take med kit and I healed! It miracle she is!

She's not that good! I died several times during your guys' adventure, and she never once healed me!

Because you never with us! You keep saying weird things and disappearing! You die many times, but never once ask for help!

Yeah, whatever, we've answered the question, so why must you go on and on about it?

I couldn't phrase it better myself

Of course you couldn't, you're just some stupid Eskimo wearing a stupid blue parka

Ahem, I believe the politically correct term is INUIT, not Eskimo

Shut up

I agree, you just don't know when to shut up.

I've never seen anyone not shut up as much as you don't!

You should shut up

Like they said: shut up...damn Eskimo...

...

Ah, Emi, I see you didn't rip into me. I see you're waiting for just the right moment to jump in and defend me!

...Actually, I was trying to think of a clever way to tell you to shut up, but I just can't think...all I can see in my mind is bouncing blue Eskimos, and it's very disturbing.

I can take a hint...but let us get back to the subject at hand: Akiko!

How about let's not and say we did?

No, Akiko is woman, here her roar! Not just anyone can go through medical school you know! She's a phenom! Where would be without her?

Well, obviously, we'd be the same place as we are now. If you look around you she's not here, so therefore we're without her.

He's got a point

Was anyone talking to you?

...Yes?

Wrong answer, we're outta here.

But I thought...

See ya, Blue-Boy!

Lates.

Good bye! I come visit sometime!

It's been delicious!

Toodles.

I'll be back. Women are more powerful than you think!

Uh...that didn't go too well. In conclusion: Akiko is healer of status ailments of the party...and a nurse...and a woman...and uh...what else?

*Silence*

...Oh well...